After many bad experiences with school, what convinced Sarah Cullen to talk to some teachers about stammering?

When I was 19 I referred myself to speech therapy. I was seeing a speech and language therapist called Prue for a few months and I got on so well with her but unfortunately she had to leave work. I was devastated, this was the first person who I could ever talk to about stammering, (apart from my brother) and I was becoming much more fluent.

My next speech and language therapist was called Sheila Croney and was an angel in disguise. Prue had introduced to me a method called 'easy stammering' which as I am sure you know is all about making the first letter small and breathing out the second letter. Sheila took me through many relaxation techniques because I was all hunched up and terrified someone would ask me a question. I was having panic attacks if someone did ask me a question, or even if I saw someone in the street that I knew I would get all hot and clammy and would most of the time run away from the situation as fast as I could. What a way to live!

I convinced Sheila that I wanted to carry on with the 'easy stammering' method and one day I came home and providing the atmosphere was relaxed I could speak completely fluently. That was the first real day of my life.

With Sheila's help I managed to go with her to a presentation in front of a group of 12 special needs teachers (after many bad experiences at school I found teachers particularly evil!) I wrote about my personal experiences and stood up in front of these teachers and read out two pages of A4 and only stammered once! After that achievement my confidence was just so much better, my quality of life was so much improved. I have a letter that the school sent me and I think my speech really did make a difference to their perception of a stammer and how it affects everyday life.

When you have enough confidence it is amazing what can be achieved - that vicious circle of stammering and losing confidence can be broken.

From the Summer 2003 edition of Speaking Out